FARGO, ND—Area resident Frank Mullholland found that he was the victim of either a faulty memory or supernatural promptings when he called 1-900-Hot-Babes early Tuesday morning.
Having been lured into dialing the number for Hot Babes by a late-night television ad depicting scantily clad women wielding firearms, Mullholland dialed a number on his telephone. Expecting a pleasant conversation with a hot babe, Mullholland was surprised when a representative of the church asked if he wanted the Bible or the Book of Mormon.
“I thought them’s was weird names for girls,” said Mullholland, breaking open a beer in front of two youthful male missionaries. “But when the lady said she’d send ’em right over, I just asked for both.”
Mullholland admitted that he was further pleased when the person on the other end of the line asked if he wanted a free video as well.
“How could I refuse?” asked Mullholland, turning Our Heavenly Father’s Plan over in his hands, which he admitted was not quite what he expected.
“Do you kids make much money at this?” he asked the missionaries who were delivering the merchandise.
Spokesmen deny that the church is using any innovative television campaigns that may have confused Mullholland. “Maybe Brother Mullholland was dialing the number while one of our ads was playing on his television,” speculated Elder Dwight, one of the missionaries who delivered the books and video.
“I think the Spirit guided him,” countered Elder Murray, the senior companion of the duo, as he waved Mullholland’s tobacco smoke away from his face.
The missionaries refused the videos Mullholland offered to lend them. “I figured one good turn deserves another,” he said.